


i wanted you to be better

by superhusbands4ever (Potterwatch97)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Angst, Gen, Homecoming spoilers maybe??, I don't consider it a spoiler, I mean Tom just blurted it out during an interview so, Iron Man is Peter's Hero, Kid Peter Parker, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter just wants to be like Tony, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-27
Updated: 2017-06-27
Packaged: 2018-11-19 14:52:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11315706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Potterwatch97/pseuds/superhusbands4ever
Summary: Peter is five years old when he watches Tony Stark announce to the world that he's Iron Man.Peter is seven years old when Iron Man rescues him at the Stark Expo.Peter is ten years old when he watches Iron Man fly a bomb into a portal in the middle of New York, never to return.Peter is fourteen years old and Tony Stark needshishelp to save the day.Peter is fifteen years old the first time he disappoints his hero.





	i wanted you to be better

**Author's Note:**

> So this was written because [this was announced today](http://superhusbands4ever.tumblr.com/post/162294844539/dailymcugifs-i-can-confirm-that-that-is-peter) and I have a lot of feelings about it. Also written based off of [this art by artinggrace](http://artinggrace.tumblr.com/post/158973736052/2008-2012-2017-so-its-confirmed-canon-peter-was) that I have wanted to write a thing for for the _longest_. So here we go!

Peter could hear his parents talking to his aunt and uncle in the other room, but he wasn’t paying attention to what they were saying. His eyes were glued on the evening news that had been left on when everyone had left the room.

The newsman was talking about a press conference that had happened earlier that day, something about Tony Stark and a new robotic hero that had been seen fighting at Stark Industries over the weekend.

Peter’s hands clenched around the toy robot he held in his hands as he watched the red and gold one on screen. The picture was shaky and blurry, but Peter could clearly make out the red and gold robot fighting the big gray robot on screen. The face of it looked angry, its eyes radiating a bright blue that matched the circle of light in its chest. Peter gasped as the robot - Iron Man, as the newsman called him - caught the car that the other robot threw in his arms, gently placing it on the ground before taking off after the other guy.

“Woah,” Peter whispered, clutching his toy tighter.

The news cut back to the press conference from earlier, Tony Stark standing at the podium with a picture of Iron Man brought up next to him.

“ I am Iron Man,” Tony said, looking into the camera. Peter felt as though he was looking right at him.

He heard his parents and aunt and uncle come back into the room.

“Momma… look, it’s Iron Man!” Peter said, pointing at the television.

“Yes, baby, I see,” she said, coming up next to him. She reached over to turn off the TV, taking Peter by the shoulders and leading him over to where the others were standing.

“Peter,” his mom started, crouching down in front of him. She ran her hand through Peter’s hair and he smiled at her.

“Sweetheart, you know your father and I love you very much, right?”

Peter nodded, reaching out to play with a piece of her hair that had come out of her ponytail. She smiled at him, a tear slipping out of the corner of her eye. She quickly wiped it away.

“Why are you sad, Momma?”

“Peter,” his dad said, kneeling down next to his mom. “Something came up at work, kiddo, and your mom and I have to go away for a couple days. So you’re going to stay here with Aunt May and Uncle Ben until we get back, okay?”

Peter nodded, looking over at his mom.

“When will you be back?”

“We’re not sure, baby,” she said, reaching down to fuss with his shirt. “But we’ll come back to you as soon as we can, okay?”

Peter nodded again and took a step forward to hug his mom. She wrapped her arms around him and held him tight, so tight Peter almost couldn’t breathe.

“Don’t be scared, Momma.”

His mom chuckled and kissed his head again, pulling back and putting her hands on his shoulders.

“You’re such a brave boy, sweetheart. I promise we’ll see you again soon. Can you be a brave boy for me until then, Peter?”

Peter looked at his mom with tears in her eyes, and at his dad, who’s face was very serious. He looked down at the robot still clutched in his hands.

He looked at his mom and smiled. “I can be brave like Iron Man!”

His parents laughed as his dad pulled him in for another hug, holding him just as tightly as his mom had.

“That’s right, champ,” he said, lightly cuffing him on the chin when he pulled back. “Just like Iron Man.”

Peter smiled and hugged his mom while his dad spoke to his aunt and uncle one more time.

“I love you so much, Peter.”

“I love you too, Momma.”

“Mary,” his dad said, putting a hand on his mother’s shoulder and pulling her away. “Mary, we need to go. _Mary_.”

His mom gave him one last kiss before she got up and followed his dad. Uncle Ben reached down to pick him up, and Peter wrapped his arms around his neck.

His mom turned around one last time, waving her hand at Peter and blowing a kiss. Peter waved back and watched as the door shut behind them.

They never came back.

* * *

Everything around him was chaos. People were running and screaming. He could hear the Hammer drones flying through the air, and he watched as they shot after Iron Man.

He had been so excited to come to the Stark Expo, begging and begging his aunt and uncle to take him since it was happening right there in Queens. At first, they had been wary, realizing that it would probably be a lot of money to be able to get into any presentations Tony Stark was in, as they knew that was the main reason Peter wanted to go. Once it was announced that the Expo would be running for a whole year, the chances of Peter being able to go seemed a lot higher.

Unfortunately Uncle Ben hadn’t been able to save enough to get two tickets to see any events Tony Stark was in, but he had saved up enough to go to a couple events. Peter was excited to see all the different inventions and all the different robots. Even if he didn’t get to see Iron Man, he was happy to be able to go.

He and his uncle had been at a presentation about the history of Stark Industries when suddenly a giant robot had crashed into the side of the building. Alarms started blaring and people started screaming and running for the door. In all the chaos he had been separated from his uncle, getting dragged outside and into the middle of the attack by the panicked crowd.

He turned and ran when another woman grabbed him, his hands coming up to grasp his Iron Man mask as she pulled him away from more explosions. He had tried to stay in the same area he knew his uncle was last in, trying to find him, but he wasn’t having any luck. There were so many people screaming, so much noise going on that he didn’t think his uncle would be able to hear him if he called for him.

Suddenly people were screaming again and running in the other direction of the building Peter had been trying to get to. He turned and watched as a giant robot walked forward slowly, and came to a stop a few feet away from him. It towered over him by a good six or seven feet and appeared to be staring at him as if waiting for him to move.

_Maybe I can help,_ Peter thought, thinking of the repulsor gloves he had on his hands. _I can help Iron Man._

He raised his hand slowly, bringing his palm up flat in a ‘stop’ gesture like he had seen Iron Man do so many times before. A _giant_ gun appeared out of the shoulder of the robot, and it pointed it right down at Peter.

He heard a clank and thud and heard the whining of the repulsor blast warming up before something shot out from behind him and took out the robot standing there.

Peter jumped back and looked up at his savior. Iron Man himself was standing there, his blank mask and bright eyes looking straight down at Peter.

“Nice work, kid.” He said, before taking back off into the sky again. Peter stared after him, amazement in his eyes and a warm feeling taking over his heart.

Iron Man saved _me! I met Iron Man! Iron Man spoke to me!_

“Peter! PETER!”

He was jerked out of his reverie by the sound of his uncle's voice. Suddenly his uncle was there beside him, pulling him into his arms and crying into his hair.

“Oh my God, Peter,” he pulled back and ran his hands over Peter’s body as though looking for injuries. “Are you ok? Are you hurt? Did that thing get to you?”

He pulled Peter’s mask off and Peter looked at him with amazement and admiration in his eyes.

“Uncle Ben, Iron Man _saved_ me! _Iron Man!_ ”

“I know, buddy, I saw, that’s amazing,” his uncle said, though he looked more terrified than amazed. “But right now we need to get out of here, okay? People are hurt and those things are still coming so we need to leave.”

Peter nodded and didn’t complain when his uncle picked him up. He was a big boy now, eight years old, and could walk for himself, but he knew his uncle could run faster than him and could get them out quicker.

He wrapped his arms around his uncle’s neck as he looked back up at the sky, watching Iron Man fly overhead with War Machine, shooting down the robots.

* * *

He clutched his Iron Man action figure tightly in his hands, leaning further into his aunt where they were crouching behind a table in a cafe. Peter could hear people shouting and explosions outside, but they didn’t seem to be getting any closer.

His uncle had had to go into the Manhattan area on business today, and since Peter was on summer break, Aunt May decided that she and Peter would go with him. They’d catch a movie while he was in his contracting meeting, and then they would meet at a little cafe on the edge of town to get lunch before going home.

Unfortunately, they seemed to have picked the wrong day to visit as not even 10 minutes after they walked into the cafe did the huge portal open up over Stark Tower just blocks away from where they were. Aunt May had gasped in shock when the alien creatures began to pour from the hole.

Fortunately, they seemed to be far enough away that most of the fighting didn’t reach them, only the occasional alien getting out this far. Unfortunately, that meant that there weren’t may fighters paying attention to this area, so it was still unsafe to leave the safety of the cafe. The National Guard and the Army had come running through the city, and one guy had stayed in the cafe to make sure nobody got in and nobody got out.

Peter glanced down at his Iron Man figure again and wondered if Mr. Stark would be joining the fight. It made sense that he would, given that the aliens were attacking right over his tower, and Peter hoped that Iron Man would be able to help handle it and that Mr. Stark could stay safe.

There was movement from over by the window as someone stuck their head up to glance out, only to gasp at what they saw.

“Iron Man is flying straight into the portal!”

Peter’s head snapped up, looking out of the window. Sure enough, there was something flying up towards the portal, but Peter couldn’t make it out from back here.

Ignoring his aunt’s cry, Peter got up and ran towards the window. His uncle followed him and kept telling Peter to duck back down.

Peter ignored him too as he put his hand on the window and glanced outside.

“Look’s like he’s got some bomb on his back,” the National Guard guy said, glancing out the window with the other man. There were no aliens on the street outside right now, as all time seemed to have stopped to watch as Mr. Stark flew into the portal. “Maybe that’s how they’re planning on taking them out?”

“How’s he gonna get back out though if that closes the portal?”

“Suicide mission if I ever saw one.”

“Yeah, but… he’d be saving the whole city. Stopping these… alien things from taking over.”

“Huh. Didn’t know Stark had it in him.”

Peter turned and looked up at Stark Tower one more time, just in time to see Iron Man fly through. Time seemed to stand still again, and everyone held their breath as they waited for the portal to close, for Iron Man to come back, for the aliens to stop attacking - some sort of sign that whatever Iron Man had been planning with that bomb had worked.

Suddenly the people in the cafe started cheering as the portal began to shrink, and everyone watched the aliens on gliders in the distance collapse and fall and watched as the giant flying worm-looking monsters fell out of the sky.

Peter ignored the cheering around him. He felt his heart clench and his breathing hitch as he watched the portal grow smaller and smaller with no sign of Iron Man.

“Peter,” his uncle said quietly, putting a hand on his shoulder and trying to pull him away from the window. “Peter we need to get out--”

“No!” Peter said, wrenching out of Uncle Ben’s grip. “No, wait!”

“Peter, we have to--”

He ignored his uncle and pressed his hands to the glass, watching as the portal continued to shrink. It got smaller and smaller, and Peter could feel the dread building in his gut, he could feel the tears gathering in his eyes--

“Wait, look!”

The man next to him was pointing at something falling just below the portal, and Peter felt relief rush through him as he realized it was Iron Man.

_He made it. Mr. Stark made it!_

He didn’t complain when his uncle picked him up and dragged him away from the window. Everyone in the cafe was trying to figure out how to get home safely, but Peter wasn’t listening. He was still watching outside, out the window at Stark Tower, feeling his heart burst with happiness and relief.

Iron Man had saved everyone.

* * *

Peter knew his whole life was going to change the day he got bit by that spider. He just never could have imagined how much.

Uncle Ben was gone, killed by the robber that Peter hadn’t been able to stop. He had _super powers_ and he couldn’t even save his uncle. _With great power comes great responsibility._ He knew that this was how he had to honor Uncle Ben and his death, by using his powers for good and to stop other criminals. He may not have been able to save Uncle Ben, but maybe he’d be able to use his powers to keep other people's’ loved ones from getting hurt.

The day Mr. Stark had shown up in his apartment and asked him to help stop Captain America in Germany had been like a dream come true. He was meeting his hero, his idol. The guy he had looked up to ever since that day his parents left almost ten years ago. And this time he needed _Peter’s_ help. It was more than Peter could’ve ever dreamed of.

And then Germany happened, and he met the Falcon and Captain America and that guy with the _awesome_ metal arm. He fought against Giant-Man alongside _War Machine_ and _Iron Man_ , people he had idolized for the longest time.

And then after it was all over, he was dropped back into his everyday life in Queens. He went back to school, where he was a nobody. He went back to fighting petty crime in the streets. And sure, Mr. Stark had let him keep the suit, but he knew he could do so much _more_. He had held his own in Germany against those other heroes, even if he did get hurt in the end. He had proved to Mr. Stark that he could fight, that he could _handle_ being an Avenger and fighting in the big leagues if Mr. Stark would just _give him a chance._

_This is my chance to prove myself,_ he had thought, when he heard about the illegal weapons trade at the shipping docks that day. He could go in, stop the trade, and prove to Tony that he could do more than stop purse thieves and bank robbers. He could handle this kind of thing.

He thought about the dread he had felt when he realized just how much he’d underestimated that trade. He had underestimated the kinds of weapons these guys would have and hadn’t been prepared for what would’ve happened if they used those weapons on civilians instead of just himself.

He thought about how terrified he was, the absolute _panic_ he felt when he realized what the Vulture had done to the ship. Split straight down the middle and falling apart. There were civilians on that ship, innocent people who had gotten caught in the crossfire and had to pay for the mistakes Peter had made. He had jumped into action, doing everything he could think of, using all his power and all his strength to try and keep that ship together. He tried as hard as he could but he knew he was failing, and Peter had never been more relieved in his life when Tony showed up to help him.

He had known Mr. Stark would be mad, but Peter wasn’t prepared for just how much it hurt when he felt the full power of Mr. Stark’s disappointment on him.

_“What if somebody had_ died _?”_

_“I was just trying to be like you!”_

He had thought about what Iron Man would have done if he’d known about the weapons trade. He’d have gone to stop it, right? These guys were building illegal weapons and selling them on the black market. Isn’t that what Tony had created Iron Man to stop? Didn’t Tony become Iron Man to get his weapons out of enemy hands? Tony had been so angry when he found out these guys were weapons dealers, were dealing dirty, were willing to risk civilian lives so they could make some cash. Peter hadn’t done anything Tony wouldn’t have done if he was in Peter’s shoes.

...right?

_“I wanted you to be better.”_

Peter thought about when Tony came back from his kidnapping. He thought about the day he watched the video of that press conference, of Tony, sitting on the floor, bruised and beaten and tired, but still standing up for what he believed in. He had just been held captive for _three months_ and upon returning the first thing he had done was try to rectify his mistakes.

Peter thought about his parents, when he was five years old and watching, mesmerized, as Iron Man flew across the screen, as Tony announced his identity to the world and decided to use his power to make the world a better place. He thought about his mom, and how she had told him to be brave, and how when he thought of being strong and brave, the first person that came to mind was Iron Man.

He thought about the Stark Expo when Tony had saved his life. He thought about how Tony had stopped and taken the time to help him, some random ass kid, while he was in the middle of having his expo attacked, and his best friend overpowered. He thought about how Tony had let him believe that he had taken out that Hammer drone instead, congratulating him on helping instead of berating him for being stupid and getting in the way. He thought about how he had saved the expo that day, and Queens along with it.

He thought about New York, about Mr. Stark willing to give his _life_ to protect the people of the city, the same people who often had nothing positive to say about him. The same people who often put him on a pedestal just to tear him down, and how in spite of everything he was still willing to sacrifice himself to keep them safe.

He thought about Germany, and how desperate Tony had seemed to get Captain America to listen to him, and how tired and miserable Tony had seemed after once everyone was gone. He thought about how Tony kept going, kept donning the armor and going out to help people even though he had just been destroyed by the loss of his team. He thought about how Tony had stepped up to take up the mantle of head of the Avengers, how he had created the Damage Control program to help clean up after the Avengers messes. He thought about Tony not letting pain and devastation keep him from doing the right thing.

He thought about Tony Stark, billionaire, genius, superhero, taking time out of his busy life and out of his days to check some lame, nobody kid from Queens. To build him new gear, to mentor him, to teach him. He thought about how Tony set everything aside to help Peter when he was in need like Peter was just as important as everything else in his life.

He sat down on his bed and buried his head in his hands. He had given the suit back to Mr. Stark like he had asked, and now he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know where to go from here.

He opened his eyes and glanced down when he saw something sticking out from under his bed glinting in the light from his lamp. He reached down to pull it out and felt his shoulders slump, even more, when he realized it was his old Iron Man action figure. It was a little worse for wear and it’s head no longer sat completely straight on its body, but Peter could never bring himself to fix it or throw it away.

_“I wanted you to be better.”_

Peter ran his fingers over the action figure, straightening its arms and legs. He straightened out one arm, lying its palm flat in the classic Iron Man pose.

“ _I wanted you to be better."_

Peter frowned, staring down at the action figure in his hands and thinking of everything it represented.

“...but how could I ever be better than Iron Man?”

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me or talk to me on tumblr at [superhusbands4ever](http://superhusbands4ever.tumblr.com) :)


End file.
